The Attraction of London
Right I have been incredibly busy
this past weeks, from important events in the UK to the trivial of
dog/house sitting for my kids while they went on holiday, I’ve just
had no chance to type up the third part of my ‘Reintroduction’
piece for the blog. Today, to keep things going here’s something
I’d saved way back.
It shows what attracted me to London.
I don’t mean the obvious attraction to her beautiful sexiness. It
was posts like this one. They were totally different to the routine
glamour model posts of back then. Most posts back then were : Look at
me , aren’t I sexy, here’s some of my latest work, follow me, buy
more of my material. Basically they were just this and pretty
pictures. They were pretty girls, but one dimensional. Talking about
how great things were and how exciting their life was. Photos, yes.
Personality, no. It felt artificial….because it was.
London, her blog and life were real.
She was honest in the most painful and open way. She had problems and
she let us watch has she dealt with those problems. What was more
intriguing to me, was she was dealing with problems that my wife had.
But my wife refused to acknowledge her problems and wouldn’t engage
with dealing with them.
Thus is the contrast between the
model and the girl. The fantasy and the reality.
She intrigued me enough for me to cut and
paste this post back then.
The first item below in quotation marks is
my note added to the post when I saved it.
“This is something she wrote as an answer
to someone on her Tumblr
today, very interesting,
as it shows the ambiguity of her own body
image, differing between her model persona and her real life.”
September
27, 2014
"Anonymous asked: Are you able to post
any photos where it looks like you actually weigh 240. Your photos
always look so great it looks like you are more like 200. Stay
beautiful!”
“Photos are deceptive - My body is very
proportional so I SEEM smaller because of my hip-to-waist ratio….
But in real life, I am 5’4 and just very BIG. I weigh 240 and I
LOOK 240. My thighs are tree trunks. My calves are the size of a gym
rat’s biceps… My boobs are the size of a human head …. My ass
is the size of two or three regular sized butts - I often find my
size hindering. I cannot cross my arms because my boobs are too
large. My legs are so big that I have difficulty finding clothes that
fit properly - I feel physically awkward next to my tiny, healthy,
itty bitty friends even though I can hike just as far and just as
long as any of them…
Currently, I am walking and riding my bike
*everywhere* these days (I must have walked eight miles yesterday…)
- I started yoga classes earlier this week for strength training….
I feel strong and healthy and I eat very well … But I just feel
BIG.
It is weird - You know I am dating a bunch
of different guys right now - While they don’t seem to care that I
weigh 240lbs (they all seem to love it)… my size BOTHERS ME. I
don’t want to be naked next to them. I don’t want them to touch
me…. I feel unattractive and large and awkward and strange in my
own body…. I am avoiding potential sexual escapades because I
absolutely dislike the idea of someone touching my fat body
Anyways - My point is… I am incredibly
happy that my body looks so great on camera. I own the camera. I love
the camera - But I don’t feel nearly as confident about my body in
real life."
London Andrews 2014
#londonandrews
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#adultmodel
#misrepresentation
#insults
#abuse
#lies
#blackmail
#catfishing
#londonandrewsproject
#londonandrewsandme
